What are the Karma Dolls Carnies?
Todd, Goth Bear, Sad Bun, Nicodamus, Pinky, Cotton, & Tiny
Growing up, I always felt like I was on the outside looking in. I was an observer of the cliques of happy people around me. I was the middle child with my twin sisters being at the top, 3 years older then me and my little sister 6 years younger then me. As I think back, I imagine my twin sisters to be the evil Siamese cats from the story “Lady and Tramp.”
It was never simple to play with my sisters as it should have been. I was the outsider, they required me to accomplish varies tasks before I would earn the right to be allowed to join in play with them. These tasks were often impossible to accomplish. The sheer fact that there were 2 of them meant that they really didn’t need to include me. They had each other.
It was so much easier to simply create my own rag doll friends who where always happy to see me. “They” unconditionally loved me just as I was, a misfit toy, just like they were. I lovingly hand sewed each character from readily available materials such as discarded clothing, mismatched button eyes that often fell off from my haphazard stitching, leaving an X in the place of where the button had been. Then I would fill them with dried rice or beans for filling. This created a fantastic weight in the bottom so they were like weighted sack, floppy rag dolls. I took them out for picnics, posed them and took pictures with my Polaroid camera, and tucked them in at night making sure to kiss each one goodnight. I imagined we would run off and join a carnival that would accept us flaws and all.
My Dad left, my Mom worked 2 jobs to support us, other then us kids doing all the house chores, we pretty much had no structure and had no supervision. The twins would boss me, and I would boss my little sister. Someone forgot to send me to preschool, I was the forgotten one out of the 4 of us who had no education before kindergarten.
My Pre-K learning came from Sesame street and PBS since we did not have cable TV. I enjoyed the art in my collection of Dr. Seuss storybooks, which I know influenced my art later in life, well before Tim Burton films came along. As a result, I wasn’t particularly good in school unless it was something creative. I was and remain terrible at spelling no matter how much effort I put in to improving over the years. I wasn’t good at sports, we were poor so I wasn’t popular for brand name clothing, I didn’t particularly fit into any clique in school any more then I fit into my family. I was a misfit through and through. I spent the majority of my time daydreaming, writing, sketching, doing photography, creating things with my hands and selling my creations on the sly from my locker at school. I grew up on the West Coast then ran off to New York to find myself, ended up traveling and embracing that I am a Gypsy though and through.
The Karma Dolls are a product of my childhood. By being pushed out, I have become a strong independent individual who always thinks outside the box. This has helped me in life. I accept everyone. The Creator inspired me to create a world about the Karma Dolls Carnies to be a place where all are welcome. A place of imagination with no limitations. A place for all the misfit toys to gather and feel accepted just as they are. A place for people of all ages, shapes, sizes, colors and walks of life. A place to learn while having fun. A place to remember that it’s never to late to have a happy childhood.
Welcome to the Karma Doll Carnies.
YOU are perfect, just as you are.
~ Tammy
